Remember Carl Lewis? Well, apparently he was multi-faceted back in the 80's. Kind of like how Bo knew football, but during the off-season Bo also knew baseball. The problem was that he knew baseball about as well as I know Jennifer Garner, which is to say not at all.
What's all this got to do with Carl Lewis? Well, not a whole lot, I just wanted to bring Bo Jackson back into everyone's (by everyone, I mean the 4 people who actually read this) collective consciousness. Anyway, let's ignore the fact that Carl Lewis arguably may have attained musical perfection with this song (what? not even a Grammy nomination?!) and focus more on the fact that Carl Lewis broke every single rule in the "singer works out, singer hooks up" music video genre.
Rule #1: Make sure you don't look constipated while you're "working-out."
Rule #2: When you singing, try not to look too effeminate, which is the P.C. way of calling him a gay-lord. People who watch MTV like their men to be straight. Only women are allowed to be totally gay. And I don't mean dykey gay. I mean porno gay, which really means girls so horny they'll jump anything that moves.
Rule #3: No ridiculous sun glasses allowed.
Rule #4: No old people allowed. It's a well documented fact that all young people are seriously grossed out by all old people.
And this brings us to the last rule, which if you're going to totally ignore Rules #1 through 4, breaking Rule #5 would be considered a cardinal sin...
Rule #5: Under no circumstances should you ever "hook-up" with an old person in your video. I don't care if those sunglasses are totally hot and she's blowing bubbles in your face. Seriously dude, "break it up!"
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